i want the beautiful angles of
winter
skies
without the cold.

i want to have
insight and
growth.
without pain.

i want to
understand others.
without first judging them out of
fear.

i want there
to be peace among
all people.
without bloodshed.

i want to look
in the mirror
and just see me.
without my past and all the sadness and loss that
came
with
it.

i want these things.



when i was young,
i thought in terms
of
black
and
white.

and then
life happened
to me.
with its
romantic love,
and career
and being
a mom
and
i
realized that
i had to add
the importance
of grays
as well.

and now these
days,
i only
want
to
think
in
color.


things i need to make lists about

1. reasons why i felt compelled to eat an entire bag of brussels sprouts for dinner last night.

2. reasons why i always manage to spill an entire cup of coffee down my shirt only when i am wearing white

3. reasons why i would even think i could wear white shirts and drink coffee at the same time (see #2)

4. places where i put things that i want to keep "safe"

5. reasons why i feel i need to make lists all the time



i'm pretty sure that
my christmas button is broken.
i keep
pushing it
and
pushing it.

and nothing happens.

no warm fuzzies
or holiday cheer.
my heart isn't bursting with
altruistic tidings
of
all things christmas to humankind.

i think the connecting wires
were
severed and pulled apart.

does anyone know a good repairman?

because i'm definitely in need.



may god give you the grace
never to sell yourself short;
grace to risk something big
for something good;
grace to remember that the
world is too dangerous for
anything but truth
and to small
for anything but love.

so, may god take your minds
and think through them;
may god take your lips
and speak through them;
may god take your hearts
and set
them
on
fire.

amen.



william sloane coffin
adapted by h. stephen shoemaker

happy thanksgiving to you and your family with many blessings for joy, love and peace.



sometimes
when
i stand
very
still
i feel
the earth
spinning
underneath my
feet

or
is
it
that
the earth
is
still
and it
is
me
that
is
spinning?



once upon a time, there was a strange girl who lived in a fantastical place called colorado.
she was scared.
very scared.
because she was leaving her fantastical place for a different, other worldly place called north carolina.
she didn't know what north carolina would be like.
would they have tacos in north carolina?
would the people speak english?
and what about flush toilets? would they even have them or know what they were?

on her first day at school in her new world, she was seated next to a beautiful girl with soulful eyes.
she was tall and had long limbs and was the envy of all the other girls because she was so beautiful (and because she had big boobs).
but she was kind and her heart was true and she smiled at the strange girl and they became instant friends.

life took the strange girl and her friend with the long limbs through all kinds of adventures and they traveled together, laughed together, fought together and cried together.
they knew one another like only true friends can know one another.

and they still do and always will.

happy 50th birthday, sharon.
here's to 50 more wonderful years.
i love you.




"it's a good melancholia
day and i'm glad
because
i need
to have a good
melancholia day
every once in a while.",
she said.
"that way,
i'll know
how
to
be
happy
on the
other days."

,,,,,nicole desourdy

xo



dear dawn,

i was in your bed yesterday.
see me?
that's me.
in your bed.
as soon as you left, i was there.
in your warm bed.
laying on your warm covers,
with your husband.
and he loves me more than you.
because i'm cuter.
so there.

sincerely,
molly dodd

fortune cookie thursday



a. if you are in desperate need to tinkle
b. if you are holding a cup of very hot coffee
c. if you're trying to sleep
d. if you tell him to swerve to avoid the pothole

can you think of the many others i've missed?
happy thursday!

thanks heather for the link to format differently! xo



lately,
all this introspection
has been
making me feel
a
bit
tired
of
myself.

and by
acknowledging
this,
has hereby
become
introspective.

and now
i'm
even
more
tired.



i am heading on a plane to fly back to the place where i started.
a place that i haven't been to in a very long time.

even though i grew up in the south,
and call it my home,
i was born in rhode island.
and when i think of my very early years,
i think of my childhood that was rooted in
things like
the huge marigolds that grew taller than i was
the little brook that ran along the edge of our backyard
disappearing for hours to wander the woods
ballet classes that lasted all day on saturdays
catholic mass that was spoken in latin
and the beautiful colors of fall,
the fall,
the fall.

the address of the street that i lived on was 36 pleasant street.
it was there that my parents fought.
they fought bitterly
tearing one another to shreds
tearing me to shreds
on 36 pleasant street.

and so i am going back to this seemingly idyllic,
seemingly perfect
little childhood place....
this 36 pleasant street
this 36 un-pleasant street.
to wrestle with schizophrenic
memories.
and say goodbye.



i spend a lot
of time
looking up
during this time of year.

fall
is demanding.
it wants us to look at it in
all its
regal splendor.

but the real beauty,
the quiet beauty
whispers beneath our feet.